Girl Problems! Argh! :s
by Sephiralen
Summary: I was bored, i had a computer, I had an idea, and I knew how to type! all that put together becomes - this?! >.


Wow, this is weird! . 

I _know _you guys are sick of me and just wish I'd be gone – but, unfortunately, that's not how life is… Ahh, sweet, sweet suffering! :)

This is dumb, so beware. Don't say I didn't warn you! (",) Heh… Not funny. :p

Okikz, I wrote this out of boredom, so I guess you can expect more random crap later on. Oops, sorry! ;p

Yayz! _Almost_ the end of my stupid speech… so, hold on just a _little_ more – and no, I don't believe you're on the verge of insanity, by the way.

Umm… actually, I am done! Argh…. :p So that means that you CAN read now! Weezz...

  

Saria bustled around the outside of her small one floored house-thing, fidgeting as she thought. She stopped and turned her head to gaze sadly at the home that had contained her best friend, Link of Hyrule, for so long. She could only wonder what was on his mind, she wondered if he was planning on moving out of his little house to have a real life somewhere else. She knew that she mustn't be selfish and only think about her desires… but what would she do if he did leave? 

Saria sighed.

"I've grown to love him as a friend.. a-and even as a son..!" she murmured brokenly, suddenly deciding to dash off in the direction of the Lost Forest. Her fairy bounced and jingled behind her, sending wobbly rays of light stretching out like cold fingers in the dark. ".. I'm sure he loves me also.. so-so how could he.. leave..?? I always thought he loved the forest.. just like.. like m-.."

"SARIA!!" giggled a voice, "where are you running to? Hey, you guys aren't playing chase without me _again_ are you?..", there was a pause, and then, "SARIIIIAAAA!!!!"

Saria, having heard the call of her friend before but not wanting to turn around, finally decided that there was no use it letting her friend lose her voice by screaming uselessly after her. 

Sighing, Saria span around in exasperation and cried breathlessly, "YEEEEESSSSS?!"

The small Kokiri placed her hands on her hips and yelled back, "I WAS SAYING, 'ARE YOU PEOPLE PLAYING WITHOUT ME _AGAIN_'?!?!"

"NO, WE ARE NOOOOOTTTT!!!!"

"OKAY THEN.. BUT WHERE ARE YOU RUNNING TO?! I WOULD LIKE TO ACCOMPANY YOU!!!!!!"

Pausing, and thinking this idea over, Saria eventually answered hesitantly, "NOT TO DAY, NIAN!!!! … SORRY!!"

Nian began to pout, but answered meekly, "FINE THEN!! But if you get an ARM RIPPED APART by a WILD friggen RABID WOLFOS, don't come crying to ME!!!!!!!!!!"

At that she turned and marched of in the other direction, small hands still on thin hips.

With another weary sigh, Saria continued on her way, all the time thinking of her beloved Link…

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Ruto screamed and threw another randomly picked fish against the wall (argh, poor fish!), "Take that, and that, and THAAAAATTT!!!!!"

She screamed in rage once more; decided to leave the innocent fishies alone, and started throwing rocks instead. "AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

Pulling a finned arm back, she swung it forward and chucked a piece of rock at the frozen ceiling of her room. Just as it exploded into a cloud of dust, a few pebbles and small sand stones came raining down on her head.

She sighed, and plopped down into a shimmering scaly heap. 

"Why can't I ever just get a freakin' boyfriend!?!?!?" she cried with exasperation. "I mean, I _AM _the friggin' princess of the _FRIGGIN_ Zoras, AIN'T I?!"

There was a scraping noise, which was followed by a sickening slurping, and Ruto suspected that her father was having his fourteenth meal that day. 

Crying out in dismay, Ruto could only see her life crumbling up before her. She wished that her once beautiful Zoran mother were still here - here to hug and comfort her. But unfortunately, her mother had choked to death on Ruto's first try at making a famous Zoran Sardine-Fish-Pie. With a groan, Ruto remembered that fateful day, where she had killed her own dear mother accidentally… It had brought a terrible sadness to all of the Zora people.. As well as some of the involved citizens of Hyrule.

Ruto sat and wondered, she was pretty wasn't she? She was adventurous, right? Didn't guys like those kinds of girls? Or was it just that she was Zoran….? 

"Racists…" she hissed under her breath, resting her head in one hand. 

She thought about all the young Zora men she could date… but none of them were hot or cute enough for her. She wanted someone wild, tall, handsome, and interesting. Like Link.

Except he was Hylian. Not to mention he was already dating Malon.

"Grr…" Ruto angrily began to trace the shape of a malformed heart in the water with her finger. She sighed and looked up as a young Zora child came running into the watery room she sat in. 

"HEHEHEHEE!!!" the child laughed insanely, then slipped on a piece of seaweed and smacked his head against the wall. "Ow... that hurt…WAAAHHHH….!!!!!!!!!!!"

Ruto rolled her eyes and pulled her self to her feat using the leg of a broken chair – she had flung it against the wall and broken it. 

She then trudged out of the room and made sure that she scowled at the crying child… except for that she hadn't considered he would give her the finger.

So, kind of shocked, Ruto marched her way to her father's room, where he sat in his usual place swallowing rather large amounts of food. 

"Hello sweet-heart," he said gruffly after gulping down a plate of expensive tuna sushi.

"Hello… father," Ruto replied, bowing to him as was the Zoran way and smiling sweetly. "I have something important to tell you"

The Zoran that had been waiting on her father got the clue; bowed his way to the door, then left. 

"Yes dear, anything on your mind?" 

"Actually, yes, there is."

"What is it then?" her father asked curiously, while trying his hardest to wipe his mouth with his napkin using his stubby, somewhat useless arms. 

"Well father, have you thought about who would be an heir to your thrown after you die?" Ruto started casually.

"Well, yes, in fact I have. Why do you ask, Ruto dear?" 

"_Because father, no one has asked me out yet!!!" Ruto exploded, throwing her finned arms up in dismay, shooting beams of reflected light at the stone ceiling._

"That's normal. I expected that."

Ruto scrunched her nose up in anger. "Father, that usually means I am not pretty, or not interesting enough for guys to be around because… OBVIOUSLY… no one wants to be with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Yes, that could be the case…" Her father seemed to be considering something.

 Ruto stared blankly at her huge father and then cried, "FATHER! You're _not helping any." _

"I'm not?" He seemed surprised at this, and his stupidity set Ruto's jaw on edge. 

"That's IT! I can't take this anymore!!! ARGH!!!" turning sharply on her heal, Ruto ran to the left of her fathers room, stopped, ripped the sign out of the ground, slammed it against her knee which broke it in half, then howled in pain. She then continued her way stiffly, limping, to the top of the waterfall… and jumped off. 

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WE! THIS! IS! FUUUUNNNN!!!! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!"

There was a terrified scream from below her, and Ruto looked down too see a young, kind of cute Zoran just underneath her falling figure.

He put up his hands to shield his face and head against her, but that didn't work.

"Nooooo!!" he screamed, wincing.

"Shit!" Ruto shrieked.

Then, a collision occurred. Ruto landed with a horrifying splat on the poor guy, and smashed him down to the bottom of the little lake thingy in the Zora's Domain place; knocking all the air out of his lungs. Lucky for him though, he had gills. (",)

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The whinnying of horses and the clucks of distressed chickens was all that was heard on that heated sunny morning. Malon Scrubbed harshly at a windowpane, sweating and NOT happy.

"Why is it that they always give ME the hard work while dad sits around sleeping and Ingo drinks till he's dead drunk!" she sighed angrily, stopped scrubbing, and then smashed her hand down energetically on the glass. Luckily, nothing dangerous happened :).

She then turned and with a "Hya!" threw the soapy sponge as far as she could, unfortunately that wasn't very far.

"MALON! Stop throwing sponges again! That should cost you a good 7 rupees!!" Talon yelled from inside the small wooden cottage grumpily. 

"And I CARE?!?!?!" she screamed back, grabbing the bucket of soapy liquid and dumping it onto the yard. She kicked the second one and sent the stuff flowing in a bubbling river down the little pathway than ran into the farm. She kicked the bucket once more, and it went rolling down to stop in front of a dejected looking cow, which looked up at her through heavy eyelids. "And what do _YOU_ want? I aint feeding ya' at all to day…. YOU can just STARVE for all I care!!!!!!!"

"Malon, stop screaming…. You might wake up the neighbors!"

"What NEIHBORS?!?! …..Uh! You know what?! I just can't TAKE this anymore…. ARHG!!!!!!" with a squelch Malon gathered up her skirts and flung herself (seemingly) down the farm into a sad little shed just a few meters away. She made sure that she slammed the door as hard as she could, and then sat down huffily into the hay that poked at her skin uncomfortably.

She heard a groan, a splintering sound, and an annoying creak. She yelped and flung her work-worn hands over her ears. She looked up in annoyance and saw the door splinter, and fall to the ground with a loud _SPLAT_. 

She gazed at it for a bit, looked up and saw Ingo peering out from around a corner stupidly at the door as if he couldn't decide what had just happened, looked back at the door, and let out a heart-pained wale.

Yeahz, I'm done. (",) 

Okayzz… that was stchupid! :s

. don't bother me about it for the rest of my life, okayz? :p

thanx for reading this, whoever read it… :p

bbyezz!

-blue

(by the way, this was supposed to be funny, was it? . nooo…)


End file.
